A woman who confessed to getting pregnant by another woman's husband is worried he could apply for joint custody – and take their unborn child into a home she believes they will be "unwelcome" in.
Taking to Mumsnet, the expectant mum admitted she met the man on Tinder last year before going on several dates with him. The relationship eventually "went cold," however, until the woman discovered she was expecting in February this year.
"Tried to contact the guy – he had changed his number," she explained on the Am I Being Unreasonable forum. "Went to an address I had met him at before, turned out it was an Airbnb he had rented. I literally had no other way to contact him so I carried on and decided to do it alone."
Two months later the man's wife made contact via Facebook. "I asked her if we could meet for coffee as we needed to talk, insisted I knew nothing about her existence (which I didn’t) but we needed to talk," the woman continued. "Met up with her a few days later and it turns out they have a son who is my daughter’s year at school (my daughter changed schools last September). I told her the news, naturally she was upset and left."
Within days of the meeting the woman received a phone call from the kids' school saying her daughter was being bullied – and the parents of the culprit had been called in. "Yep, you guessed it – it was him and his wife," she continued. "My daughter was distraught, stayed with her dad for a while and came back just over a week ago. We are hardly talking still."
Pregnant Stacey Solomon brands herself an 'old fogy' over NYE plans with JoeIn a new twist, the man has been in touch expressing his desire to be "part of the child's life," which she "respects". She added: "What I can’t respect though is the fact his wife told their son and he and others have chosen to bully my daughter over it – me and her dad are considering, again, moving her schools next year and talking about home schooling."
To add insult to injury, the woman claims her former fling is now "going to contact a solicitor and looking into joint custody" despite not "offering to attend a single appointment or offering a single penny" towards things for the baby. "I just think it’s f***ed that he still lives with his wife and wants to take a child that was made from the result of his affair into their home?!" the woman said. "She doesn’t want anything to do with me but he tells me she is OK with it and I just can’t see that being true."
However, Mumsnet users were quick to deliver some seriously bad news.
"You have no choice," one person said. "You decided to keep his baby and under UK law that baby has a right to a family life and to know its father. The courts won't stop him from having significant contact with his child because he's in a long term relationship in a secure home."
Another agreed: "You have decided to have a baby daddy you now have to live with the consequences no legally you can't pick and choose what you do, you could benefit from getting legal advice and for your daughter to get some professional help to help her through all this mess."
A third agreed: "You took a risk by having a child with a man you don’t really know. Barring egregious behavior, he is able to petition the court for parenting time. It will start slowly which will give everyone time to acclimate."