PALOMA FAITH has opened up about her divorce for the first time, revealing she ended things with her husband.
The Brit Award winner split from artist Leyman Lahcine, dad to her two kids, after a decade together.
Opening up on the separation for the first time, she reflected: "In the last few years I've come closer to failure, to despair, to grief and loss than ever in my life.
"I had a choice: I could disappear into my melancholy or I could wear it as a badge of honour.
"It wasn't an option for me to stop in my tracks and break down. I have two children. I am and always will be the breadwinner - a source of strength and support for many others.
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"And I wasn't happy, I wasn't mentally well, and I had to do something about it."
Looking ahead to dating other people, she added: “I’ll never be perfect so if that’s what you want, go find someone else that you’ll cheat on. Be boring.
“It’s never boring with me. Maybe annoying, maybe irritating, maybe stressful. But not boring.”
She has mined last year’s heartbreak for her sixth studio album, The Glorification Of Sadness, and has today dropped lead single How You Leave A Man, which includes a pointed dig at her ex.
Paloma sings: “He’ll know when you change your locks and your number, he’s sleeping with people unknown.”
But laughing about the track, she added: “It’s funny, empowered, but also a bit tongue-in-cheek. I like to laugh at my own expense all the time.”
But she refused to hold back in documenting the devastating reality of her emotions.
Asked if her ex-husband had heard it, she said: “Some of it. I sort of had to ask permission.”
Speaking as she played Bizarre tracks from the album, which will be out on February 16, she said: "The album is about taking responsibility for your own happiness.
"The track listing runs chronologically through the course of a long-term relationship breakdown that involves children, because that’s a very different experience to the cut-and-runs of youth.”
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Paloma, who will tour the album next spring, said: “It feels like my most personal work. I basically sell the agony as a commodity.
“It’s like, ‘The last few years have been really awful’, then going, ‘Let’s put a cherry on top of that s**t’. That’s why I called it The Glorification Of Sadness.”
But she is determined not to paint herself as a “victim” on the album, which features collaborations with Chase & Status, Kojey Radical and Maverick Sabre.
Paloma added: “Quite often women are singing about themselves as victims when it comes to breaking up and it’s quite celebrated.
“But I was like, ‘I don’t really relate to that, I don’t want to send that message out’.
“I want to say we are strong, we are in command of our own happiness and we are going to be brave and sometimes make mistakes. But done with our heads held high.”
Yet clearly the feelings are still extremely raw for Paloma, who started dating Leyman in 2013 and married him in 2017.
She has never confirmed their nuptials, but refers to the fact they were a married couple with the new song Divorce.
Before hitting play on the emotional track, she said: “This one is very difficult for me to hear. This is one of the saddest. It’s uncomfortable. I’ll try not to cry.”
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Asked whether singing the songs would take her back to a painful time, she added: “I’m still in it, so I’m reliving it anyway.
"We have children so we have to see each other all the time. The scab comes off with the plaster.”
That said, she doesn’t hold back and one track has the very direct title Eat S**t And Die. She said with a laugh: “Obviously the album takes you through all the stages of grief.
"There are profound moments and the various, ‘Just f* everyone!’ moments. This takes us into the rage stage of grieving.”
And although she details her very real emotions on the record, she is reluctant to divulge further details about their relationship.
The Only Love Can Hurt Like This singer added: “It’s a different feeling having kids and knowing they’ll read about it in ten years.
“I have to be respectful of that because when they’re older they might say, ‘F*** you’.”
From what I’ve heard so far, this sounds like it could be the best album of Paloma’s career.
And if it helps her deal with her feelings, it will have been worth it.
