DEAR DEIDRE: I AM sick to the back teeth of my mother-in-law.
She makes no secret of the fact she despises me, and I’m fed up with her vile verbal abuse.
It’s got to the point where I’m genuinely thinking of leaving my wife and my children.
I’m 39 and my wife is 35. We’ve been married for 14 years and have two children – sons aged 13 and 11.
Our youngest has special needs.
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My wife was better paid than me so I gave up my job to be a house husband and look after the children.
I love my kids and my wife, but her mother is making my life unbearable.
Everything works well until she arrives and then it’s like a black cloud descends on our home.
She visits at weekends and sometimes during the week as well.
I have always been hospitable and waited on her hand and foot, but she still makes it quite clear what she thinks of me.
She tells my wife she thinks I’m useless and that she could have married someone better than me.
She helps out with the kids one day a week so my wife doesn’t want to upset her, but I can’t carry on.
DEIDRE SAYS: What about you being upset? Does your wife realise how humiliated you feel?
You’ve put everyone else first and swallowed the insults for so long it seems she’s forgotten that you also deserve respect and consideration.
The time has arrived to remind her of your value, and tell her that you shouldn’t be taken for granted.
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Explain that her mother’s behaviour is unacceptable and you need – and expect – her support.
Please don’t break up your family because of this judgmental woman.
Take her behaviour out of the equation and it sounds like you have a lovely family set-up.
But you must make it clear your wife’s mum needs to change or she’ll no longer be welcome in your house.
That is also in your children’s interests.
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