ROMAN Kemp’s world was turned upside down in 2020 when his best friend and colleague Joe 'Producer Joe' Lyons took his own life.
Joe was just 31 at the time and the news of his death shocked the nation – and left Roman struggling for many years.
Roman was told the heartbreaking news while he was at work on Capital Radio, after colleagues visited Joe's home when he didn't show up for work.
From the start
Joe worked on the Breakfast Show and was Roman’s mentor when he started at the station in 2014.
The pair’s working relationship quickly turned into an important friendship for them both.
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Roman said: “He was with me right from my very first show. He taught me everything I didn’t know about sitting in a radio studio.”
The news affected Roman so much that last week he stepped down from the station – and has since revealed life was never the same after Joe’s death.
No idea
Following his death, Roman made a documentary about male suicide and revealed he had no idea what Joe was going through.
He said: If you'd have lined up 20 people you would have thought were suffering mentally he [Joe] would have been the last person.
"He was the happiest person, putting everyone ahead of him and it ripped my whole life apart - I could not understand it.
"I didn't know what had happened. It ripped my life, his whole family, his close friends, our team, everything and it just put me in this state where I'd feel like I knew I had to do something for him and for his family I guess.”
Roman also said he felt responsible for what had happened and said he should have spoken to Joe.
He said to Mylene Klass on her podcast They Don't Teach This At School, he said: “It is very easy for me to say, ‘my friends are upset because of what they see on social media, that is why my friend killed himself.
“No, realistically my friend killed himself because I didn't actually see anything and I didn't as a friend question it.”
He added: “I can only tell you that I know for a fact, had I had a conversation with Joe this never would have happened. It wouldn't. I wouldn't be here talking to you about it.
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“I know that in my heart, I know that and therefore at some point whether it be a one percent, I have to take some form of responsibility.
“Joe did what he did and that's fine, but next time I am damn making sure that that's not happening again and I am now taking responsibility.”
Moving on
Roman left Capital last week after six years and has now revealed that Joe’s death was part of that decision.
Speaking to the Daily Mirror about the death of his pal, he said: "It's not normal, imagine a tragedy happened in your house - you're going to want to move."
He continued: "I went through such a horrible moment in that room, in that studio - four years on and I've been living that same day over and over again, without the awful event."
Roman added: "I've tried to spin the plates and tried to do everything and I've realised it's getting in the way of my life. You can't enjoy your own life.
"If you think of a radio show, every day you've got to go out in front of the public and dance and every now and then you've got to give yourself a rest and I've not been doing that for myself."
Roman, who has been open about his own battle with depression and mental health, said he got to a point where he decided he needed to "leave it behind".
