Nicolas Hamilton had to sell a Mercedes car gifted to him by his Formula 1 champion brother Lewis to pay off debt caused by an "all-consuming" gambling addiction.
In his new book, 'Now That I Have Your Attention', the 32-year-old reveals how he became depressed and considered suicide as a result of his addiction. It began with one £2 on football team Arsenal to score a goal, and turned into a six-month binge involving online casinos and blackjack from his bedroom.
Nicolas has cerebral palsy and is a role model to millions through his racing career. He joined the British Touring Car Championship in 2015 and celebrated his career-best result of sixth place at Donington Park only last year.
But in 2017 he fell into a hole, eating Pot Noodles in the dark as he spent thousands gambling online. He even had to sell a luxury Mercedes C63 gifted to him by his brother Lewis so he could afford to pay off a tax bill.
He described his turmoil in his book, writing: "I felt so ashamed, using this amazing gift to pay my tax bill. It felt like I had practically stolen the money from my brother and I have never forgiven myself for that.
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"It destroyed me. I got a real wake-up call. I had no way of going forward because I'd lost everything. I was stuck. I had a balcony at my flat and I was thinking what would I do if I just jumped off it."
During the height of Nicolas' addiction struggles, Lewis was dominating the F1 championship with Mercedes and earning an eight-figure salary. Nicolas didn't feel comfortable going to his brother or parents to open up about his problems and instead turned to the Samaritans helpline to help him get through.
Speaking to The Times about his struggles, he said: "I wanted more of the winnings - and the losing didn't really deter me. It just got me in a cycle. I couldn't stop thinking about it - I just wanted to go back to my computer.
"The whole day would go quite easily. I could see it was a problem but I was too far in. I was scared to stop. I'd lost so much money that I felt like, if I stopped, I was in a hole that I wouldn't get out of."
Fortunately, he did manage to pull himself out and has overcome his gambling addiction. He recently visited a casino while in Las Vegas and did not place a bet, and declared that "gambling is no longer an issue" for him.
For emotional support you can call the Samaritans 24-hour helpline on 116 123, email jo@samaritans.org, visit a Samaritans branch in person or go to the Samaritans website.
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