APPRENTICE star and West Ham United vice-chair Karren Brady answers your careers questions.
Here she gives advice to a reader on how to maintain a good relationship with their manager while broaching an uncomfortable subject.
Q: I work in communications for a charity and I used to enjoy our team meetings, as we’d bounce ideas off each other.
But, lately, my manager has been treating our meetings more like therapy sessions, oversharing personal information and asking us to tell our stories, too, which makes me feel very uncomfortable.
I think it’s unprofessional to be put on the spot to talk about personal issues in a work meeting, but as she’s my manager, I don’t know how to broach the subject. Help!
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Mariam, via email
A: First, reflect on specific instances that have made you uncomfortable, so you can articulate your concerns effectively.
In a one-to-one meeting with your manager, start by acknowledging the positive aspects of team meetings and expressing appreciation for the open communication. This helps set a positive tone.
Then explain that you feel the agenda has changed recently, with a focus more on personal experiences and less on work. Use “I” statements to avoid blame.
For example: “I feel uncomfortable discussing personal matters in a work setting,” rather than: “You bring up personal matters, which makes me feel uncomfortable.”
Explain that you enjoy your job and work relationships, and suggest that perhaps there could be a separate forum for personal conversations where people can choose to interact.
Also, ask your manager to share their perspective so you understand their intentions and can work together to find a solution that is comfortable for everyone.
If you approach the conversation with professionalism and honesty, you can hopefully maintain a good relationship with your manager.
- Got a careers question for Karren? Email bossingit@fabulousmag.co.uk.
