Adrian Chiles has announced that his father has passed away, sharing that he had spent decades "worrying" about the thought of it, which he feels was "pointless" in the end.
The presenter, 56, shared this week that his late father Peter Chiles died, aged 86, on March 9. He said his father had fallen and fractured his shoulder in January, before ending up in a community hospital, where he died six weeks later.
Opening up about his loss in a column for the Guardian on Wednesday, he said that it "slowly became clear" that Peter wouldn't be "coming out" of the hospital. He added that it felt as though his father was "stuck" between a life he "didn't want to live" and a death he "didn't want to die".
He said: "All my life I'd worried about my dad dying." Adrian added that he had felt the same about other relatives but "mainly" over his late father. He shared that he wasn't sure why and also suggested he had been "unprepared" for it.
The former the One Show host said that his father passed away around 50 years after he began "worrying" about it. He continued by writing that he has not been able to "get his head around much" in relation to the recent bereavement.
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He wrote in the column: "About the only thing I am sure of is that 50 years of worrying about it was properly pointless. Because imagining - let's call it pre-feeling - this pain turned out to be no preparation at all for the real thing."
Adrian Chiles (pictured) has announced that his father Peter Chiles passed away earlier this month (Stuart Wallace/REX/Shutterstock for Edinburgh TV Festival)Adrian said that he remains "shocked at how shocked" he is over his father's death. He added that the family "knew it was coming" though and described it as a "mercy" to Peter, as well as to his loved ones, that it "came when it did".
Further sharing his thoughts, Adrian said that although he loved his father "greatly," he is "surprised" and "even a bit guilty" about being "so terribly upset" over the loss. He went on to discuss speaking to people who lost relatives earlier in life.
He said that it feels "not far short of self-indulgent" when he shares the news of Peter's passing with friends who lost parents, siblings or children "way before their time". He further commented that he had "slightly lost sight of the fact" that the deaths of parents later in life "remain bloody awful" themselves.
Adrian questioned if the experience would have been "any easier" if there had been a different culture around death throughout his life. He also wrote in the column for the outlet that he remains "shocked" each time he writes the word "died" following the loss, adding that he was "floored" when he received a text message referring to his "dad's death" as he had not seen it "expressed like that".
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