Most people believe that quality time and communication are the keys to a happy marriage.
But one woman believes having steamy affairs is the way to keep the magic alive.
Gilly, 47, who didn't want to provide her full name, tied the knot with her husband 21 years ago.
But when their romance became stale 10 years in, she turned elsewhere to fulfil her sexual desires - and now says her infidelity saved their marriage.
Gilly, from Inverness, Scotland, initially resorted to cheating after having arguments with her husband about how often they were getting intimate.
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"My husband wasn't fulfilling me sexually and I did at the time feel like it was causing arguments because I felt like I was pressuring him for sex," Gilly told the Mirror.
Gilly felt restless in her marriage when things became stale after 10 years (stock photo) (Getty Images)"No one wants to feel like sex is a chore, it's completely the opposite of what it should be - fun!
"So me just being me… a bit adventurous, I thought I'd give it a go. It was on a whim at first that clearly has just stuck. I didn't set out for the long haul."
She had flings with a few different men until she met her current lover, 45, seven years ago.
He too is married and says because of their commitments elsewhere, they understand and respect each other's boundaries.
"The passion is still there after all these years," Gilly revealed.
"We meet up for sex when we can and it's always a thrill. Sometimes it's naughty in public places, and others it's in our houses or hotels, but it's always passionate.
"We also meet up like any other couple for dates. It's like a completely normal relationship without the annoying naggy bits."
Gilly argues that it is unrealistic to believe that just one person can satisfy someone's needs in a relationship.
She has passionate sex when she meets up with her lover - who she has been with for seven years (stock photo) (Getty Images/iStockphoto)"For me, it ensures my needs are met from all angles," she continued.
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"I think it's unrealistic to expect one person to be able to fulfil and meet every single need you have - sex, conversation, stability, security.
"It's not possible for one person to do all that, I don't think. Letting yourself love multiple people I think helps you appreciate them even more because you're focussing on what they add to you, not what they lack.
"My lover fulfils my side of adventure and I'm a really sexual person - I need that passion, that naughtiness to feel alive.
"Whereas my husband gives me stability and security - he's who I'd trust with my life."
Gilly is still sexually active with her husband but feels there is now less pressure on him when it comes to the bedroom.
She can go from seeing her lover multiple times a week to once a month, depending on her schedule.
And she'll either tell her husband she is 'working late' or is on business trips.
Gilly, who lies to her husband about her whereabouts, says she has to put in the work to balance both relationships (Getty Images)While she is leading two separate lives, she hasn't come clean to her husband and doesn't plan to either.
"Perhaps controversially, I don't see why I'd need to," she admitted.
"Our marriage runs pretty perfectly considering we've been together for so long. I really enjoy spending quality time with my husband rather than the grind of daily life.
"When you live with someone 24/7 you can become stuck in a rut, watching TV all night, barely talking. I don't feel like we're like that and he's certainly not had any complaints."
But there have been some close calls, she says, and it can be hard work splitting her time between both partners.
"If you're in it for the long haul you have to be organised," she said.
"You have to have a good memory or you'll slip up and tell someone something you shouldn't then have to back peddle your way through it.
"You've got to be prepared to put in the work."
Gilly, who met her long-term lover on dating website IllicitEncounters.com, has however admitted her secret boyfriend to a few of her friends, who have then followed suit.
She added: "It feels like a bit of a taboo - women taking control of their sex lives - but I'd honestly recommend women to do it more. Do something for yourself, ladies."
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